a journal of my creative efforts, past and present

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Location: Berkeley, California, United States

Saturday, December 02, 2006

YouTube dilemma resolved, for now...

Well, as many of you may have noticed, I just deleted my former post about YouTube and replaced it with this one. My original post included some musings on whether or not to post excerpts of my film unto the YouTube site. After a few conversations with several people, I have decided not to do that. I think it's a mixture of things really. M initially suggested it because he loves my film and he thinks it should get more viewers. It screened at multiple festivals and won a few awards. Recently, I just got some great feedback from a friend who saw a book version of my film. His wife and daughter loved it too. So, I was considering this new venue but in the process of deliberating, I realized that I have too many intense personal associations with this film to subject it to the possible anonymous jabs that are common in the online environment.

You see, I labored over this film while my father was dying from cancer. I happened to be in film production classes at the time so when I look at the film, it is inextricably wrapped up with memories of that time period and all of the struggles involved. I do think that a lot of people say things online without thinking about the very real emotional consequences but M doesn't think I will get a negative response. He says that I just feel this way because I have spent too much time on craigslist and craigslist is full of negativity. I think he is partly right although I myself have had mostly positive exchanges and met a lot of great people through cl. It's really the interactions I have observed between others that makes me hesitate to put this particular film up in that kind of environment. Anyways, the only thing I did really want to leave up here was the stills. Here they are:


Blogger crow_soup said...

I love the stills, but would have really loved to have seen the film...understandable considering the unaccountability of the internets though...

5:27 PM  
Blogger Green said...

I think you made the right decision, especially after hearing about your father (I'm so sorry) - that makes it even more of a sensitive issue than just being something you created that you're proud of.

Granted, I am one to err on the side of not trusting people, and while that may mean I'm not as close with people, or don't have as many people to be close with, I feel like it keeps me safe from being hurt.

M is so very sweet in his attitude of "But it's beautiful! How could anyone not love it!?"

9:42 AM  
Blogger Tina Banda said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

4:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, I kinda agree with M. It's so cute. I understand where you're coming from. I mean there are always crazies out there. But I have a hard time imagining anything but a positive response to this.

11:02 AM  
Blogger Tina Banda said...

thanks erawk. your comments, as well as the others, give me a lot to think about. maybe I just need to gain a bit more confidence.

5:53 PM  

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